COHABITATION: Boon or Bane?

Living together without marriage has really been a common phenomenon in industrialized countries across the world especially in the United States of America. This global trend started in the year 1970s and much has changed since that time. According to Janice Shaw Crouse from Beverly LaHaye Institute, Cohabitation increased 1000 percent since 1980 while marriage rate has dropped more that 40 percent since the year 1960. They have now considered cohabitation as an alternative to the married, intact, husband and wife relationship. The society was not able to stand away from modern changes of the societal structure. Some say that it is inevitable in our present society. They see it as a modern step to abyss. However, there are some who have raised their eyebrows in this social issue. Cohabitation for them is going beyond the boundaries that have been set for you by the Supernatural Divinity. This is done by those people who have a morally objectionable behavior and moral rotten fiber.

In order for us to know how people regard cohabitation in our present society in our country, I have interviewed individuals from different walks of life. Some of them are currently living in with their partners. Some are married. Some are not in relationships right now. I have also consulted someone from a religious sector. Let us determine whether these persons have the same or different beliefs when it comes to the social issue which is living in without marriage.

I had a conversation with a lady who is living with his boyfriend right now under one roof. Moreover, she is pregnant and is about to give birth this January. I asked her views and opinion about cohabitation. “As much as my traditional values are concerned, it’s the saddest decision for a woman like me. Yet, I believe that it will place me to the safest union of relationship in the sense that I can test their comfortabilities as partners and decide for themselves at the end. I consider it as an initial step to marriage or never to get married at all.” She also cited some of the benefits that she could gain from cohabitation. “It is good because I will be able to know my partner and adjust to the differences when I decide to get together in the long process. It also gives me less pressure because I do not have the deep commitment of marriage.” Nevertheless, she also admitted that there are also bad effects in cohabitation. “It is tough for me because in the eyes of the many, we are living in without the blessings of God. It also affected my family relationship because I came from a conservative family and whatever happens between the both of us; I have no right or claim to each other.”

Do males have the same views and opinions when it comes to living in? Let us find out. Here is a man who is presently living in with his partner and a father of a one year old child. He considers himself as a happy-go-lucky man before. He has that devil may care attitude. Cheerfully irresponsible, that is what he is. Moreover, both of them are liberated and tolerant of change. That is why; he had no decisions of getting married before. I asked him why a nd he said, “I am not yet ready for commitment and to settle down to a very different lifestyle compared to an unmarried life.”Now that he has joined a religious organization, he has now opened up his mind to a realization that marriage is vocation worthy of respect and dedication by the law of church and men.

I also had the chance to interview a couple wedded for 18 years regarding their perspective about living in. They are active members of the Couples for Christ. They are also against cohabitation. “At the very beginning, we wanted to marry and raise a family. It is our dream to have a happy, united and loving family.” Living in never entered their mentality. “We do not understand why there are individuals who do not get into marriage if they really do love each other. Is it because they have a plan for separation after a year or years after? If that is the case, you are not looking for a partner in life but a companion. God made man and woman to complement each other to be their partner in His creation. Marriage is a a sacred vocation.” They see living together outside marriage as a sin.

Living in without marriage is against morality. This is the stand of our religious sectors when it comes to the issue of living in. It is going against the sacrament of matrimony which is considered to be close and intimate union of couples worthy of religious veneration. It leads to sex outside marriage. It allows the people to partake in the pleasure of sex without having them face the consequences. It even leads to higher cases of broken families. It also brings harm to the children of these living in partners and economical hardships for them.

Allow me unfold to you the harm of living together without marriage. They say Cohabiting will decrease the cases of divorce in our country. How will that happen? In fact, it will only lead to a higher divorce rate. In cohabitation, there is only a little commitment to the partner. Therefore relationships are frequently broken while living together and for the rest of their life. There is uncertainty in the continuance of the relationship.

Cohabitation also harms the children involved. They are being deprived of their right of having a family comprised of two married and loving partners. If they do not have this kind of family, children will have behavioral problems and will also have a wrong picture and vague idea of what really is a family.

For me, I can say that the problem is with our society right now. Our people have turned to be so disinclined to involve themselves into marriage. There is lack in discipline so people see cohabitation no longer an erroneous doing in our society. The people should be given more information regarding this social issue so that they would not come up with poor decisions that they would surely regret in the end. As early as now, people should know the disastrous consequences that this change could bring to the individuals involved, as well as for our society and public policy. Our country is known for being so concerned when it comes to religious matters. This kind of tradition should be preserved. This is the kind of thought that should be passed to the next generations.